February 19, 2016 —Once upon a time in an urban kingdom nearby lived a girl who enjoyed the art of politics. She was always up for a good debate during family dinners and soon she became addicted to the variety of political news programs on television. Soon she realized that politics was actually a scary bedtime story—with nothing real or pure about it—and she grew sad. The current presidential primary, for example, was one of the most ridiculous and bizarre races she could remember, and it seemed never ending. There was still nine more months of campaigning before the kingdom elected anyone from the mediocre list of candidates! Not only had campaigning become too negative for the girl, it was excessively long and expensive.
One day, she leaped out of bed and began her morning ritual. She was almost ready to leave for work when she accidentally applied moisturizer too close to her eyes. Oh, how they burned! She prayed that if they stopped stinging, she’d be more careful next time. The burning sensation threw her day into a tizzy, and although she wanted to stay home and with a cool towel on her eyes, it was not possible.
The girl’s watering eyes made the drive to work difficult, especially with the blinding sun glare. Even though her vision was compromised, she noticed the troll driving in front of her throwing trash from his car window. She laid on her horn to show her displeasure. Why would anyone think it was acceptable to follow such a hideous practice? Maybe TV executives should rerun those commercials from the 1970s that showed the Native American running through the woods with a tear rolling down his cheek when he happened upon the littered woods. That would make any litterer think twice. However, this troll, she realized, had no soul.
Things didn’t get much better when she walked into her office and turned on her computer to read the daily news. Yikes! The state of Philadelphia sports, her home kingdom, was getting worse by the minute. Between the Eagles falling apart because of the actions of their former coach to the Phillies’ expectations to finish the season in dead last according to the latest MLB Power Rankings, things looked bleak. She closed her eyes and wished for a bright side, and then remembered that pitchers and catchers reported to training camp a few days before. She hoped that the new crop of young players would at least make the season interesting.
She plowed through her morning frustrated and plagued with negative thoughts about politics, burning eyes, littering and baseball. It was all too much for one morning. Then she realized that the day could only improve from there, so she smiled and lived happily ever after.