Read a Classic Novel in Less Than a Minute

September 11, 2017 — Ours is a fast-paced world where everyone wants instant results.

If you’re into classic literature and the old-fashioned way of reading by the fire slows you down too much, here’s something that will help you finish a story faster than the Evelyn Wood Speed Reading course.

A site appropriately named Book-a-Minute offers ultra-condensed versions of classic novels, bedtime stories and science fiction stories that you can read — not by fire light, but at lightning fast speed.

My favorite … The Collected Works of Virginia Woolf.

Better not let the kids know about this one. Teachers would probably hate it more than Cliff Notes.

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A Writer’s Challenge

August 28, 2017 – Ever heard of the term lipogram?

For someone who has written most of my life, and who has worked in the communications field for the last 20 plus years, it was a new one on me. However, this week I learned that a lipogram was a composition from which a writer systematically omits a certain letter or letters of the alphabet…on purpose…as a challenge.

An example of a successful lipogram is the novel “Gadsby”, a 1939 novel from Ernest Vincent Wright. The novel contains more than 50,000 words, but none of them include the letter “e”. That’s quite a challenge considering the “e” is a common letter.

Another type of challenge is writing extreme short fiction, known as flash fiction. Typically, flash fiction tells a complete story in less than 1,000 words, but many authors have challenged further. Legend has it, for example, that Ernest Hemingway won a bet by writing a six-word novel: “For sale: baby shoes, never worn.” Those words tell a complete and tragic tale. Author Margaret Atwood joined in the fun and penned: “Longed for him. Got him. Shit.” That six-word novel tells a different kind of tragic story.

As a writer, I enjoy challenging myself, but I’m not ready to tackle a full-blown lipogram, unless I choose to omit the letter “x” or perhaps “z” or “q”. Any other letter would be too mind boggling. I do, however, tackle flash fiction from time to time, but haven’t yet captured the passion or drama of Hemingway or Atwood. Although I did accept a WordPress challenge a few years back to write a complete story with no more or no less than 50 words:

“The raincoat did little to keep her dry. She hadn’t bothered with an umbrella; rain hit from all sides rendering it useless. Perhaps the storm would wash away the fear that clung to her like ivy wrapping around an old tree. Giving in, she let the rain wash over her.”

The story isn’t as vividly clear as the six-word novels above, but I will forge on. Mark Twain was right when he once apologized for writing a long letter to a friend, explaining that he didn’t have time to write a shorter one. Brevity takes time.

An Editor’s Eye

July 3, 2017 – No one is immune to making the occasional typo or grammatical error. Likewise, no one is immune to pointing out the error only to end up with egg on his or her face, although this is much less common.

I admit to feeling giddy when I find a typo in a book, a newspaper, or a magazine article. I may even take the time to report the issue. Never smugly, I handle it with care because as a communications manager, I have been on the receiving end of that confrontation, and whether you are the creator of the typo or the snitch who called it in, it can be a dangerous game.

For example, I carefully explained to the woman who runs the food cart on the corner of 6th and Chestnut Streets in Philadelphia, and in a prime spot across from Independence Hall and the Liberty Bell where the world is watching, that there was a typo on the sign hanging on the back of the cart. There is not a lot of copy on the sign; it should be an easy mistake to spot, even from the printer’s perspective, who isn’t typically accountable for typos. The other signs on the cart were fine, and the exact ice cold water sign is displayed with the correct punctuation on the front of the cart, so I’m not sure what went wrong.

The woman looked at me, offered a half-smile, and told me I owed her $1.50 for the bottle of water and soft pretzel. Somehow, I don’t think I am the first customer to bring it to her attention. I’m not sure if I should admire her restraint, or be appalled that she turned a blind eye. With a few strokes of whiteout, it would be a simple fix, and she wouldn’t have to go to the expense of printing a new sign.

Now, here is the egg on my face part of the story. Driving past a garden store a few years ago, I spotted what I believed to be the king of typos on a sign by the front door. “Hardy Mums”, it shouted in letters so bold you could see them a half a block away. I pulled over, promptly marched in to the store, and shared my discovery with the person behind the counter. My face turned red when she told me that Hardy was actually a brand name. I tried to laugh it off and save face by explaining that I’m not a gardener and I’ve never heard of the brand. I further explained that I thought the sign erroneously tried to portray “hearty”, as in sturdy enough to stand up to the brisk fall weather ahead. I was wrong.

There is a two-fold lesson here. Don’t be quick to judge a typo without knowing the all of facts. However, if you are certain there is an error, don’t ignore it. For your sake and mine, fix it.

Just Words

May 15, 2017– I’m about to reveal a big secret. I am a writer who is terrible at crossword puzzles, and who doesn’t have a huge vocabulary.

I love playing Scrabble, which is sort of like crosswords if you use your imagination, and I can do cryptograms with the greatest of ease, but when it comes to vocabulary and those five-dollar words often associated with crosswords, I panic. I appease myself with the fact that I was taught to write clearly and simply, on a level that everyone can understand.

Of course, you could argue that a writer with a limited vocabulary is like a painter who is colorblind. But I’m not that limited.

When I read “11 word games writers love” I wondered if the author considered writers who are crossword challenged. Even though she refers to the relationship between the writer and crossword puzzles as iconic, we must exist. Surely I can’t be the only one. I’ll give her a pass this time because she compiled a nice list of games aside from crosswords that will please even the mightiest of literary snobs.

And I’ll add one suggestion of my own:

If you’re mad about cryptograms, you can play to your heart’s content at www.cryptograms.org.

Muses at My Beck and Call

inspireJanuary 20, 2017 — No matter how much you love what you do, there will always be days when you need a little extra kick to get started. When the writing process becomes difficult, for example, a little Internet surfing does wonders to spark my creativity—or shock the hell out of me, which also works.

Sometimes I turn to great quotations from published authors to get me started. They act as a muse and provide instant inspiration to get writing juices flowing again. My favorite is a quote by author Tom Robbins. More clever than inspirational, it always puts things into perspective for me:

“I have been sick ever since I started working here, but I’m well today and I won’t be in anymore.”

Here are a few “more traditional” quotes that do the trick to round out an inspirational top 10:

“There’s nothing to writing. All you do is sit down at a typewriter and open a vein.” – Walter Wellesley “Red” Smith

“If there’s a book you really want to read, but it hasn’t been written yet, then you must write it.” – Toni Morrison

“I’m not a very good writer, but I’m an excellent rewriter.” – James Michener

“Easy reading is damn hard writing.” – Nathaniel Hawthorne

“The best time for planning a book is while you’re doing the dishes.” – Agatha Christie

“Better to write for yourself and have no public, than to write for the public and have no self.” – Cyril Connolly

“The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense.” – Tom Clancy

“Being a writer is like having homework every night for the rest of your life.”  – Lawrence Kasdan

“All you have to do is write one true sentence. Write the truest sentence that you know.” – Ernest Hemingway

 

Celebrating the written word

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October 14, 2011 – Next Thursday, October 20, is The National Day on Writing, and this year, it won’t pass me by without a celebration.

Selecting a day to honor writing began as a project by the National Council of English Teachers to encourage people to share why they write. The site also asked writers to tweet why they write, and last year over 60,000 writers participated. Join the conversation on Twitter with #WhyIWrite.

Here are a few responses that caught my eye:

1. “It’s cheaper than a shrink.”
2. “I can’t always say what I want to be heard.”
3. “To retain sanity.”
4. “To become a better person.”
5. “It’s the first thing I was good at.”
6. “There are restless characters clamoring to get out.”
7. “Because I can lie things into existence.”
8. “It comes out a heck of a lot better than when I speak.”
9. “It’s the least destructive addiction I could find.”
10. “Who says I have a choice?”

While I can relate, especially to #8 my answer is simple: it makes me happy.

My biggest fear for the future of writing, and why it’s so important to celebrate a national day like this, is that social media has turned many of us away from proper spelling or grammar. Aside from the occasional LOL, I’m not even able to use shortcuts or dominating abbreviations. I follow a simple rule when writing anything, from an email or text, a short story, or a speech for the CEO where I work: anyone who puts pen to paper or fingers to keyboard should care about the outcome.

Thank you to all of the writers who have fulfilled me, shocked me, made me laugh and cry, and thoroughly entertained me through the years.

Three More Clever Writing Tools

March 11, 2016 Whether you’re trying to write a term paper, the church bulletin or the great American novel, writing can be a challenging process. Here are a few tools (or games) that get the juices flowing and make the process fun.

Portent’s Content Idea Generator
I discovered this gem when out of desperation I Googled, “what the heck can I blog about today?” Simply type in a word or idea in the subject line and the generator will provide you with a unique topic and a possible title.

portent generator
I typed in Philadelphia Phillies, and it generated an interesting idea: How Twitter can teach you about the Philadelphia Phillies. I never wrote about the topic—although Twitter probably could teach me a thing or two about my favorite baseball team—but it certainly started the idea process in my mind’s generator.

A few of the suggestions also gave me a chuckle. Since I’m in total political mode these days, I typed in two of the presidential candidates’ names and received the most amusing responses. You can’t argue that either topic would make juicy writing!

– You haven’t seen this Hillary Clinton list on Buzzfeed
– 20 ways knowing about Donald Trump will land you in jail

First Line Generator
Writing fiction may seem easier that nonfiction (because you get to make it up!) However, completing that first sentence is tough. Here’s a unique tool from across the pond that solves the problem. You don’t even have to type an idea. Just click and go!

first line

This is a great tool for setting the wheels in motion. It also helps you understand the importance of hooking your reader with that first sentence.

The site also has features that can help writers with plots, characters, the names of towns and more.

writing exercises

Writer’s Block Generator
Itching to write a story but don’t have a compelling plot? That isn’t a problem with this handy tool. Again, it comes to us from across the pond—no wonder those Brits can write!—and offers plot ideas, character names, and more.

plot generator

Bonus: the site also offers helpful tips on the writing process!

You won’t likely use one of the prompts to write a complete novel – or maybe you will – but it serves as the perfect brainstorming tool to generate your own ideas and get past an attack of writer’s block.

To find more of these fun tools search “Writing Generators” in your browser and explore!